Thursday, April 30, 2009

The Bitch is Back

Breakfast with Stephy. Topic: His resemblance to Steve Carrell is more pronounced than ever. I cannot make this up, you'd really have to see a picture. But, in the interests of privacy, I will not post one. Trust me on this one.

Today, we introduced the dance party into the law review office. Chief, while approving the idea of the dance party, will not participate. Lame. It's pissing rain and no one wants to study for the heart-attack inducement that is finals, so instead, we spin around in our office chairs to "Come on Eileen."

Productivity. We haz it.

We haz also disspelled the rumor that Law Review is a productive, studious sort of organization. Between the chair-spinning dance party, people randomly breaking into Do Re Mi in a train station, Mice mauling nursing home residents, Claire's ultimate playlist, Showtunes, and the extensive discussion of the merits of Newsies, I think we've frightened the prospective students. Also, WHY bring prospective students here now? I think the sight of me alone should scare them off. Add in my impression of Claire getting hot in her graduation gown while listening to "Buttons" and I think it's a lock.

On the subject of Newsies, Christian Bale, WHY do you break my heart by saying "Time has healed" the Newsies "wound?" Now I'M wounded. C'mon now, embrace Newsies, SEIZE THE DAY!

I have picked my Westlaw prize. It means I have to get like, a thousand points a month until graduation, but dammit, I want the Calphalon pots! And, as Kati points out, it's not like I'll have a wedding registry anytime in the next few years. I wonder, where's my shower for surviving 10 years of heartbreak and jackasses (and sometimes jackasses that break your heart)? Don't I deserve an ice bucket? Don't I deserve matching dishes? Or a set of really good knives? I need a set of really good knives!

Kati will not let me have knives right now.

On another note, Kati, my avenging angel, has taken justice into her own hands with a well-timed Twix theft. There is a land called Passive Agressiva and Kati is their Queen. Moral of the story: Justice is swift and it steals your candy.

Unfortunately, none of this is conducive to studying. I should be more concerned about the exam I have tomorrow. But I do have a kick-ass outline.

The undergrads continue to wait in droves for study passes. It's all I can do not to scream "RUN! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!" Another day, when I have not already used up my disruption quota for the day.

Discoveries via Facebook: I took the "Which Musical Theatre Leading Lady Are You?" quiz and I'm Elphaba. "Oh, you're a witch and you fly, big surprise!" Kati embraces my witchness more than the average bear.

Tomorrow, I learn how professionally responsible I am. After that, I rediscover how irresponsible I know myself to be. Bachelorette weeekend with my roomies from college. I'm super excited because we havent all been together since we graduated.

See? I'm not totally dead inside.